Spotlight Interview: High Level Social Networking Coach for Introverts!

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  • Thank you for taking the time to do this interview with me! Please tell us a bit about yourself and what you do currently…

Thanks for having me, it’s a pleasure to be here.  A little about me…

My name is Nick Shelton, I grew up extremely shy and introverted.  So much so that when I started a new school in the second grade the teachers thought I was deaf and put me in the hearing impaired kid class.  I don’t know why, I guess they didn’t know any better at the time. But it was actually pretty cool. There were only four of us in there and we were learning sign language and becoming good friends quickly.

The fun all ended about a week into it when my mom found out I was in there and explained to the teachers that I was not deaf, I was simply very shy and they kicked me out of that class and put me back in “general population”.  As you can imagine, that sucked. And that was the start of a long battle of social awkwardness and shyness.

Middle school and High school I had trouble fitting in and trouble talking to girls.

When I got out of high school I figured if I could make some money, that would solve everything.

I became a commodity futures trader and was able to make quite a bit of money fairly quickly. But money didn’t help my social situation.  I was the same guy, I just had nicer stuff.

Then I tried alcohol which worked a little bit but then you have to be drinking all the time and that comes with its own problems such as getting a reputation as a drunk dude.

I wanted to upgrade my life. I knew I could be better.  I was tired of living in the shadows. I was tired of not being seen, heard, invited and included.  Most of all I was tired of people underestimating me.  

I had to find a way out.

You’ve heard the sayings “show me your friends and I’ll show you your future” 

“Your network is your net-worth” “you are the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time around”

Ok so…

Where do you find these 5 people?  When you find them, how do YOU get there and when you get there, how do you actually connect with them?

I read the books and took the courses about networking and small talk and all of that sort of thing.  NONE of them worked for me. They weren’t designed for introverts, they were made for “normal” people, not people like us.

I was very depressed but I didn’t give up. I was determined to find a way.

Using the superpower of introverts (the power of observation) I started going out, out on the town by myself.  I’d just sit and observe. I’d watch and study social interactions and dynamics between people. Taking what I learned, I put together a system.  A blueprint for step by step socializing and networking techniques specifically for us introverts.

I applied it to myself and was able to build a very strong, close, high level, international network of friends, colleagues and associates which allows me to be able to do a lot of things most people don’t get to do.

I often get invited to high-end, exclusive events by and with like-minded people that I enjoy being around who enjoy being around me.  And not just big events, small intimate parties, gatherings and experiences that I previously would not have even known existed or would not have been invited to. In addition to that, I get access to investments and opportunities that I would not have been able to have before as well.

So I was able to network a whole new life, a better life.  A life where I am known, seen, heard, included and invited.  It’s my dream life!

And as for what I do now, I teach people (introverts) how to do the same. I train them how to level up their lives through networking.  And I show them in a simple, step by step way that is specifically designed to work for people like us.

If they’ve tried and failed with other methods, they’ll find success here.

 

  • What inspired you to start doing your own business venture?

Excellent question! There are two main reasons actually.

The first being, I am truly passionate about this mission.

I know firsthand how depressing it can be to be invisible and live in the shadows all the while knowing you can do and be so much more if you only knew HOW.

I wanted to matter, to have a voice, be included, invited, noticed and have access to the best opportunities and people.  And after I learned all of that was possible through networking and there was nothing I could find out there that was designed specifically for introverts to do this, I knew I was the one that had to do it.  

Since I was successfully able to do it for myself as well as show some of my socially awkward and shy friends how to do it too, I knew this was my calling.

I believe if you can network and navigate social situations smoothly, you can have anything you want.  

Number two is I’m a networker, I build social networks, and the higher quality my network is, the better my life is.  By helping people build their high-quality networks, the people I help are usually very happy with me and become part of MY network and I a part of theirs. So the more people I help, actually, in turn, it helps me because I am connecting and forming relationships with them, they will have access to me and my network and I will have access to them and theirs. So we all benefit. I even have a private Facebook group that is like a “pre-built” network for people who work with me. It’s a beautiful community.

 

  • What has been your biggest achievement so far?

My biggest achievement so far in the networking realm… I’ve been invited to a lot of cool and exclusive events around the world but there is one that really stands out to me.  First I must tell you I am a big fan of boats, sailboats, yachts…that sort of thing. And I tell my clients “always put your interests out there” because a lot of times, people connect and bond over  your interests but nobody is going to know if you don’t actually tell them. So, I always mention to people I meet that I love boats.  

Now through my network, I have a connection who participates in sailboat races in the Gulf of Mexico.  Well, one day before a race they had one of their crew members drop out and they needed to find a replacement crew member on short notice.  They said, “Hey, Nick likes boats, call him!” and they called ME.

I said, I’d love to crew on your boat but I don’t know how to crew a racing sailboat.  The captain said, “Can you do exactly what I tell you to do?” and I replied, “Yes” then he said, “OOk, you’re in!”

We came in fourth place and it was one of the best experiences of my life.

I apply a lesson from that to my teaching as well.  When my clients aren’t sure if they can become master social networkers I simply say, “Can you do exactly what I tell you to do?”, and we transform lives.

 

  • What fuels you to keeps you going each day?

It’s great meeting and learning about new people. Everyone has a story and it is so interesting to learn the similarities and differences between us.  But I really love making that connection and sharing a moment with someone whether it be someone new or someone I’ve known my whole life. Making the connections and seeing others do it as well. That’s what it’s all about. That’s what keeps me going. 

 

  • Who are the top 3 celebrities/experts you’d love to work with? And why?

I’d have to say George Clooney because he is so charming and maybe I could be more charming simply by being around him and learning the mystery of his way.  Also, he gives a lot back to the community and I really admire that.

Keanu Reeves, mellow guy, low key, seems like one of us introverts and appears to have a good head on his shoulders.  Doesn’t take things too seriously, takes care of business and seems like a fun guy to be around.

Tony Robbins because it seems like he pretty much has it all figured out and time with him would be time well spent. I’ve always admired him.

 

  • Take a moment to close your eyes. Where do you see yourself in 5 year’s time?

In 5 years I see myself still working with introverts, helping them to navigate social situations better as well as build and maintain strong social networks and relationships.  And I’d like to do a lot of travel and visit friends, get a lot of face to face time in with them. (This is something I already do, I just figure in 5 years I can be doing it even more).  Travel to visit friends, associates and colleagues while attending cool events and activities as well as taking advantage of investments and opportunities as they present themselves. 

 

  • If you could get the perfect help from an online tax return service, what would they do for you?

The perfect help from an online tax return service, in my opinion, would be to make the process as streamlined and simple as possible with great customer service that would be available to smooth out any snags or answer any questions that may arise.  That’s it!

 

  • Can you give our readers 2 key tips for success in business?

Absolutely! 

#1. Always show up early. It makes a good impression, gives you an advantage on getting set up, and puts you in an excellent position to observe and gather any additional information you may need to give your very best. 

 

#2. Always send handwritten thank-you notes after every event, interview, or outing.  The reason being, you want to be remembered. How many people do you know that send handwritten thank you notes after events?  I’m guessing its very few.

 

  • If you were stuck on a desert island and could only bring 3 things what would they be?

A knife, a lighter and a net.

  • How do you describe yourself in 5 words?

Happy, Mellow, Optimistic, Determined, Confident

 

  • Thank you for taking the time to do this interview with me! Where can we find and follow you online?

Thank you for having me! It’s been an honor!

You can find me at:

https://www.connectedintrovert.com

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